Family Update Summer
Greetings, Saints of King's Church!
Welcome to a 'slimmer and trimmer' newsletter as we commence the shift over to Subsplash! We hope that all of the information you need has been preserved as we shuffle stuff 'round within the app. Notably, upcoming events, the Bible reading schedule, directory information, the Sing Your Part App, and our website link have been moved over to "Resources" on the home screen in the app. Here in this post, you will find our regular devotional piece and follow-up questions, the catechism selection for August, the preacher and reader schedules, and this month's book review (thanks Kelly Coe!). Of particular note below is a brief piece the elders wrote to anticipate the men's Smoke, Whiskey, & Words evening coming up on Aug. 3; please give attention to it as you are able. As always, we hope you profit from, and enjoy, it all.
Fuel for Life and Joy
The question, “What is motherhood?” is the question that feminists have neither asked nor answered, according to Douglas Murray in his 2020 book The Madness of Crowds. “…[W]hy is it, after all these decades, that feminists and others have been unable to more fully address the role of motherhood in feminism?” Citing the prominent academic and feminist Camille Paglia, he goes on to write that “motherhood remains one of the big unresolved questions for feminists. As Paglia herself has written, ‘Feminist ideology has never dealt honestly with the role of the mother in human life. Its portrayal of history as male oppression and female victimize is a gross distortion of the fact.’”
Murray goes on to quote Paglia’s articulation of the dilemma feminism faces. She writes, “The exclusive focus of feminism was on an external social mechanism that had to be smashed or reformed. It failed to take into account women’s intricate connection with nature — that is, with procreation. In this era of the career woman, there has been a denigration, or devaluing of the role of motherhood.” The culprit is alleged to be the costs of parenthood in general and of motherhood in particular. Physical, social, psychological, and (not least) economic costs.
In light of this, one might ask Murray’s question thus: “Why do so many women postpone or avoid motherhood?”
Murray reflects: “As The Economist put it, ‘Having children lowers women’s lifetime earnings, an outcome known as the “child penalty.”' It is hard to imagine [writes Murray, to his credit] who could read that phrase, let along write it, without a shudder. If it is assumed that the primary purpose in life is to make as much money as possible, then it is indeed possible that having a child will constitute a ‘penalty’ for a woman and thereby prevent her from having a larger sum of money in her bank account when she dies [compared to her male counterparts]. On the other hand, if she chooses to pay that ‘penalty’ she might be fortunate enough to engage in the most important and fulfilling role that a human being can have.”
Which brings us to a question all of us (not just mothers) must ask, “In what ways will you spend yourself?”
Setting aside pregnancy and child-bearing, every act is one of service for a person, or group of persons, and is therefore a kind of “spending” of oneself. If we consider, for example, each Lord’s Day worship service, which of the following is NOT someone spending themselves for others?
When it comes to loving your neighbor, “spending” is a great word to use. Another great word is “used up.” Murray concludes his piece by leaning on the "American agrarian writer” Wendell Berry, who wrote:
We all have to be used up by something. And though I will never be a mother, … I gladly belong to my wife, my children, and several head of cattle, sheep, and horses. What better way to be used up?
Indeed, we are being used up, and we’re being used up by each other. And that’s as it should be. Every doughnut table wiped on Sunday, every towel or t-shirt folded at home, every mail drop as you leave work, every thoughtful Scripture texted for encouragement are all ways we “use up” ourselves for one another, ways we give to each other. It really is true: more blessing comes to those who give than comes to those who receive (Acts 20:35). Let us not doubt, but believe, that Jesus sees, values, and recompenses every act of goodness done in faith. And not just according to its worth, but more than it's worth. If something so mundane and easy as giving a cup of cold water calls for a reward, then quite frankly there are many ways to use ourselves up doing good to others, knowing that we are, in a sense, storing up treasure in heaven, because Jesus said that's the way the world works. And we look to him, not to one another, for our reward because that’s what it means to love each other for Jesus’ sake, because his rewards are far better than anything we could give each other in return.
Murray goes on to quote Paglia’s articulation of the dilemma feminism faces. She writes, “The exclusive focus of feminism was on an external social mechanism that had to be smashed or reformed. It failed to take into account women’s intricate connection with nature — that is, with procreation. In this era of the career woman, there has been a denigration, or devaluing of the role of motherhood.” The culprit is alleged to be the costs of parenthood in general and of motherhood in particular. Physical, social, psychological, and (not least) economic costs.
In light of this, one might ask Murray’s question thus: “Why do so many women postpone or avoid motherhood?”
Murray reflects: “As The Economist put it, ‘Having children lowers women’s lifetime earnings, an outcome known as the “child penalty.”' It is hard to imagine [writes Murray, to his credit] who could read that phrase, let along write it, without a shudder. If it is assumed that the primary purpose in life is to make as much money as possible, then it is indeed possible that having a child will constitute a ‘penalty’ for a woman and thereby prevent her from having a larger sum of money in her bank account when she dies [compared to her male counterparts]. On the other hand, if she chooses to pay that ‘penalty’ she might be fortunate enough to engage in the most important and fulfilling role that a human being can have.”
Which brings us to a question all of us (not just mothers) must ask, “In what ways will you spend yourself?”
Setting aside pregnancy and child-bearing, every act is one of service for a person, or group of persons, and is therefore a kind of “spending” of oneself. If we consider, for example, each Lord’s Day worship service, which of the following is NOT someone spending themselves for others?
- Writing a prayer
- Leading music
- Singing in the pews
- Preaching
- Playing an instrument
- Locking up
- Unstacking and placing chairs
- Ironing the table cloths
- Halving donuts
- Cleaning coffee pots
- Taking sermon notes
- Steaming table cloths
- Initiating conversation
- Reading Scripture
- Setting up sound equipment
- Administering the sacraments
When it comes to loving your neighbor, “spending” is a great word to use. Another great word is “used up.” Murray concludes his piece by leaning on the "American agrarian writer” Wendell Berry, who wrote:
We all have to be used up by something. And though I will never be a mother, … I gladly belong to my wife, my children, and several head of cattle, sheep, and horses. What better way to be used up?
Indeed, we are being used up, and we’re being used up by each other. And that’s as it should be. Every doughnut table wiped on Sunday, every towel or t-shirt folded at home, every mail drop as you leave work, every thoughtful Scripture texted for encouragement are all ways we “use up” ourselves for one another, ways we give to each other. It really is true: more blessing comes to those who give than comes to those who receive (Acts 20:35). Let us not doubt, but believe, that Jesus sees, values, and recompenses every act of goodness done in faith. And not just according to its worth, but more than it's worth. If something so mundane and easy as giving a cup of cold water calls for a reward, then quite frankly there are many ways to use ourselves up doing good to others, knowing that we are, in a sense, storing up treasure in heaven, because Jesus said that's the way the world works. And we look to him, not to one another, for our reward because that’s what it means to love each other for Jesus’ sake, because his rewards are far better than anything we could give each other in return.
| Table Talk Question |
When it comes to using yourself up, consider your family, your budget, your living conditions, etc., and ask, What activities has God made you for? What goes on in our community that you are meant to be “used up” by? Yes, there are some things anyone can do, and there are other things that are particularly hard for other people to do. But when we think about the fact that “we all have to be used up by something,” looking for something to do becomes much more exciting. Not unlike discovering that you’ve been given $1,000,000 and that you must spend it. The only questions that remain are, How will you spend it, and What will you get for your money? In biblical terms, the questions become, Who will be the target of your efforts to bless, and What will your neighbor, or the next generation, have or become as a result of how you spent yourself today?”
Catechism At Home
Lord’s Day 36
WSC Q. 82. Is any man able perfectly to keep the commandments of God?
A. No mere man, since the fall, is able in this life perfectly to keep the commandments of God, but does daily break them in thought, word, and deed.
WSC Q. 83. Are all transgressions of the law equally heinous?
A. Some sins in themselves, and by reason of several aggravations, are more heinous in the sight of God than others.
WSC Q. 84. What does every sin deserve?
A. Every sin deserves God's wrath and curse, both in this life, and that which is to come.
Lord’s Day 37
WSC Q. 85. What does God require of us, that we may escape his wrath and curse, due to us for sin?
A. To escape the wrath and curse of God, due to us for sin, God requires of us faith in Jesus Christ, repentance unto life, with the diligent use of all the outward means whereby Christ communicates to us the benefits of redemption.
Lord’s Day 38
WSC Q. 86. What is faith in Jesus Christ?
A. Faith in Jesus Christ is a saving grace, whereby we receive and rest upon him alone for salvation, as he is offered to us in the gospel.
WSC Q. 87. What is repentance unto life?
A. Repentance unto life is a saving grace, whereby a sinner, out of a true sense of his sin, and apprehension of the mercy of God in Christ, does, with grief and hatred of his sin, turn from it unto God, with full purpose of, and endeavor after, new obedience.
Lord’s Day 39
WSC Q. 88. What are the outward and ordinary means whereby Christ communicates to us the benefits of redemption?
A. The outward and ordinary means whereby Christ communicates to us the benefits of redemption are, his ordinances, especially the Word, sacraments, and prayer; all which are made effectual to the elect for salvation.
Lord’s Day 40
WSC Q. 89. How is the Word made effectual to salvation?
A. The Spirit of God makes the reading, but especially the preaching, of the Word, an effectual means of convincing and converting sinners, and of building them up in holiness and comfort, through faith, unto salvation.
WSC Q. 90. How is the Word to be read and heard, that it may become effectual to salvation?
A. That the Word may become effectual to salvation, we must attend thereunto with diligence, preparation, and prayer; receive it with faith and love, lay it up in our hearts, and practice it in our lives.
WSC Q. 82. Is any man able perfectly to keep the commandments of God?
A. No mere man, since the fall, is able in this life perfectly to keep the commandments of God, but does daily break them in thought, word, and deed.
WSC Q. 83. Are all transgressions of the law equally heinous?
A. Some sins in themselves, and by reason of several aggravations, are more heinous in the sight of God than others.
WSC Q. 84. What does every sin deserve?
A. Every sin deserves God's wrath and curse, both in this life, and that which is to come.
Lord’s Day 37
WSC Q. 85. What does God require of us, that we may escape his wrath and curse, due to us for sin?
A. To escape the wrath and curse of God, due to us for sin, God requires of us faith in Jesus Christ, repentance unto life, with the diligent use of all the outward means whereby Christ communicates to us the benefits of redemption.
Lord’s Day 38
WSC Q. 86. What is faith in Jesus Christ?
A. Faith in Jesus Christ is a saving grace, whereby we receive and rest upon him alone for salvation, as he is offered to us in the gospel.
WSC Q. 87. What is repentance unto life?
A. Repentance unto life is a saving grace, whereby a sinner, out of a true sense of his sin, and apprehension of the mercy of God in Christ, does, with grief and hatred of his sin, turn from it unto God, with full purpose of, and endeavor after, new obedience.
Lord’s Day 39
WSC Q. 88. What are the outward and ordinary means whereby Christ communicates to us the benefits of redemption?
A. The outward and ordinary means whereby Christ communicates to us the benefits of redemption are, his ordinances, especially the Word, sacraments, and prayer; all which are made effectual to the elect for salvation.
Lord’s Day 40
WSC Q. 89. How is the Word made effectual to salvation?
A. The Spirit of God makes the reading, but especially the preaching, of the Word, an effectual means of convincing and converting sinners, and of building them up in holiness and comfort, through faith, unto salvation.
WSC Q. 90. How is the Word to be read and heard, that it may become effectual to salvation?
A. That the Word may become effectual to salvation, we must attend thereunto with diligence, preparation, and prayer; receive it with faith and love, lay it up in our hearts, and practice it in our lives.
Elder Report
“No Whittling During Worship”
Before smartphones, the opportunities for distraction were real but limited. For example, a kid might’ve been tempted to whittle during the age of the Scotch Covenanters, meeting in some highland hillside some crisp Spring morning, illiterate and with nothing else to do. Distraction has always been a problem, to greater or lesser degrees. But in the age of the smartphone, it may well be endless.
Just consider the activities that one can engage in (whether a child or an adult) while sitting in a pew on Sunday morning: trade crypto currencies, email lesson plans, schedule a doctor’s appointment, watch pornography, initiate an Amazon return, submit a term paper, purchase groceries or gifts, watch another more “engaging” sermon with captions, learn how to tan leather…, etc., etc., etc.
And now, with our new King’s Church app, we — the leaders — made it possible (even encouraged you?) to keep handy, and even use during worship, the very device that makes these activities so convenient, tempting, or both. Yes, the sermon notes feature is the most likely one you’ll use during worship. But it’s not as if the other ones turn off just because you’re in church. (Imagine seeing a time stamp of 10:32 a.m. on a Cork Board post by Ben Tate advertising a free tire swing!)
But beyond Sunday morning, the competition for your attention continues. Our new app — like every other one — competes for your eyes, your ears, your affections. How many times have we ignored the dignity of the person standing next to us in line because we “needed” to check the headlines — headlines we had read 6 minutes earlier while pacing the grocery store aisles?
The physiological and addictive effects of smartphones are well-documented. Without thoughtful and deliberate effort to resist them, we are shaped by them. The current generation may well reach adulthood en masse without ever putting away childish thinking.
So, having acknowledged the pitfalls of smartphones, and having built an app that depends on them, we must first ask: How should we think about them? Only then can we ask: What do we do with them?
Smartphones and apps are tools. And like every tool, they must be evaluated in light of our purpose: to subdue the earth for Christ’s sake, to adorn creation so that God appears to others as glorious as he truly is. Wherever we are, whatever we’re doing, with whomever we are present, the tools we use should serve this one goal: the good of others and the glory of God.
This means is that we direct our attention and affections where they belong. Sometimes that might mean typing sermon notes on a phone while listening to the Word. Other times, it might mean putting the phone down so we can train a child, tend to an emergency, or simply be fully present before the Lord in undivided worship. The key is to use Spirit-wrought discernment.
The battle, in truth, is the same as it’s been for thousands of years,
Trust in the Lord, and do good;
Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.
Delight yourself also in the Lord,
And He shall give you the desires of your heart. (Ps. 37:3-4)
For if you live according to the flesh you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. (Rom. 8:13)
Smartphones and the internet may be new, but sin and virtue are not. These tools can serve as fresh outlets for rebellious hearts — or new way to express hearts made new by the Spirit. As we learn how to use these tools for God’s glory, may we be patient with ourselves, serious in our pursuit of holiness, and quick to give thanks for any good that God enables us to accomplish through them.
Discussion Questions
While these questions could be helpful at home or in conversation with each other, the men will use them as the basis for their discussion at the upcoming Smoke, Whiskey, & Words gathering Sunday night, August 3. As you are able, bring your own thoughts and questions related to technology use and we’ll expect to have a constructive time of singing, encouragement, and discussion sharpening one another.
Before smartphones, the opportunities for distraction were real but limited. For example, a kid might’ve been tempted to whittle during the age of the Scotch Covenanters, meeting in some highland hillside some crisp Spring morning, illiterate and with nothing else to do. Distraction has always been a problem, to greater or lesser degrees. But in the age of the smartphone, it may well be endless.
Just consider the activities that one can engage in (whether a child or an adult) while sitting in a pew on Sunday morning: trade crypto currencies, email lesson plans, schedule a doctor’s appointment, watch pornography, initiate an Amazon return, submit a term paper, purchase groceries or gifts, watch another more “engaging” sermon with captions, learn how to tan leather…, etc., etc., etc.
And now, with our new King’s Church app, we — the leaders — made it possible (even encouraged you?) to keep handy, and even use during worship, the very device that makes these activities so convenient, tempting, or both. Yes, the sermon notes feature is the most likely one you’ll use during worship. But it’s not as if the other ones turn off just because you’re in church. (Imagine seeing a time stamp of 10:32 a.m. on a Cork Board post by Ben Tate advertising a free tire swing!)
But beyond Sunday morning, the competition for your attention continues. Our new app — like every other one — competes for your eyes, your ears, your affections. How many times have we ignored the dignity of the person standing next to us in line because we “needed” to check the headlines — headlines we had read 6 minutes earlier while pacing the grocery store aisles?
The physiological and addictive effects of smartphones are well-documented. Without thoughtful and deliberate effort to resist them, we are shaped by them. The current generation may well reach adulthood en masse without ever putting away childish thinking.
So, having acknowledged the pitfalls of smartphones, and having built an app that depends on them, we must first ask: How should we think about them? Only then can we ask: What do we do with them?
Smartphones and apps are tools. And like every tool, they must be evaluated in light of our purpose: to subdue the earth for Christ’s sake, to adorn creation so that God appears to others as glorious as he truly is. Wherever we are, whatever we’re doing, with whomever we are present, the tools we use should serve this one goal: the good of others and the glory of God.
This means is that we direct our attention and affections where they belong. Sometimes that might mean typing sermon notes on a phone while listening to the Word. Other times, it might mean putting the phone down so we can train a child, tend to an emergency, or simply be fully present before the Lord in undivided worship. The key is to use Spirit-wrought discernment.
The battle, in truth, is the same as it’s been for thousands of years,
Trust in the Lord, and do good;
Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.
Delight yourself also in the Lord,
And He shall give you the desires of your heart. (Ps. 37:3-4)
For if you live according to the flesh you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. (Rom. 8:13)
Smartphones and the internet may be new, but sin and virtue are not. These tools can serve as fresh outlets for rebellious hearts — or new way to express hearts made new by the Spirit. As we learn how to use these tools for God’s glory, may we be patient with ourselves, serious in our pursuit of holiness, and quick to give thanks for any good that God enables us to accomplish through them.
Discussion Questions
While these questions could be helpful at home or in conversation with each other, the men will use them as the basis for their discussion at the upcoming Smoke, Whiskey, & Words gathering Sunday night, August 3. As you are able, bring your own thoughts and questions related to technology use and we’ll expect to have a constructive time of singing, encouragement, and discussion sharpening one another.
- How do you personally guard your attention and affections during worship? Are their habits or boundaries that have helped — or hindered — you?
- In what ways have you seen your smartphone shaped or influence your spiritual life, either of good or for ill? What adjustments do you need to make — or practices should you embrace — that could help you focus more intentionally on the God-honoring use of your time?
- When are you most likely to excuse or justify the distractions caused by your smartphone? How might Scripture reshape your thinking about presence, focus, and honor in everyday life?
- What message do we send to our children, wives, or fellow church members when we are physically present but digitally distracted — especially during worship or in times of fellowship?
- How can we, as men, lead by example in stewarding our use of technology — both at home and in the church — for the sake of others and the glory of God?
Pulpit Supply
Here is a schedule of who will be filling our pulpit for the next several weeks. Please consider praying for them as they prepare to minister to us in word and prayer.
Aug 3: Roy Atwood
Aug 10: André Fowlkes
Aug 17: Tyler Hatcher
Aug 24: Timothy van den Broek
Aug 31: Family Camp
Scripture Readers
Aug 3: Ben Tate, Amos 7:10-17, Eph 1:3-14
Aug 10: Ben Palpant, Jer 23:1-6, Eph 2:13-22
Aug 17: Merrill Miller, Ex 24:3-11, Eph 4:1-16
Aug 24: Ken Trotter, Ex 16:1-15, Eph 4:17-24
Aug 31: TBD, 1 Kgs 19:1-18, 2 Pet 3:3-15
Aug 3: Roy Atwood
Aug 10: André Fowlkes
Aug 17: Tyler Hatcher
Aug 24: Timothy van den Broek
Aug 31: Family Camp
Scripture Readers
Aug 3: Ben Tate, Amos 7:10-17, Eph 1:3-14
Aug 10: Ben Palpant, Jer 23:1-6, Eph 2:13-22
Aug 17: Merrill Miller, Ex 24:3-11, Eph 4:1-16
Aug 24: Ken Trotter, Ex 16:1-15, Eph 4:17-24
Aug 31: TBD, 1 Kgs 19:1-18, 2 Pet 3:3-15
Digging for Diamonds
This month's book review is supplied by Kelly Coe, for which we are grateful. If there is a book you have found valuable and think deserves a wider audience, and you would like to be instrumental in giving it that wider audience, please contact Ben Tate.
Brightwing Tales: Mole's Misadventure, by Ben Palpant reviewed by Kelly Coe.
Brightwing Tales: Mole’s Misadventure is a delightful new book by Ben Palpant. As an avid reader I have been on many adventures through literature, but I have never been on a “misadventure” until this book. The character of Mole resonated with me from page one-his grumpy attitude on life, his determination to do things his way, to not rely on anyone! He is real and the description of his emotions is spot on. Mole did not set out to find an adventure, rather he “fell” into it on a cold winter night. Mole has lost his wife and is living alone in his hole, determined to not feel anything or need anyone…until he runs out of tobacco for his pipe. In the dark night he sets out to his friend Rabbit’s house to borrow some tobacco and sets off on an unexpected adventure that will change the course of his life and bring him face to face with the bloodthirsty dog, Midnight.
Now that may seem deep for a children’s book, but this is more than a children’s book. Mole’s adventure ends up bringing us in contact with the most charming and noble characters who will resonate with both adults and children alike. Much as Lucy found her dearest friends once she stepped through the wardrobe, you may find yours as you enter Brightwing and set off on an adventure with Mr. Mole and his friends. Much as Lucy could only dream of going to Narnia again and again, the characters in this story are ones who we will want to visit over and over. Having read this book four times now…I would know! I hope that you enjoy it as much as I have!
Brightwing Tales: Mole's Misadventure, by Ben Palpant reviewed by Kelly Coe.
Brightwing Tales: Mole’s Misadventure is a delightful new book by Ben Palpant. As an avid reader I have been on many adventures through literature, but I have never been on a “misadventure” until this book. The character of Mole resonated with me from page one-his grumpy attitude on life, his determination to do things his way, to not rely on anyone! He is real and the description of his emotions is spot on. Mole did not set out to find an adventure, rather he “fell” into it on a cold winter night. Mole has lost his wife and is living alone in his hole, determined to not feel anything or need anyone…until he runs out of tobacco for his pipe. In the dark night he sets out to his friend Rabbit’s house to borrow some tobacco and sets off on an unexpected adventure that will change the course of his life and bring him face to face with the bloodthirsty dog, Midnight.
Now that may seem deep for a children’s book, but this is more than a children’s book. Mole’s adventure ends up bringing us in contact with the most charming and noble characters who will resonate with both adults and children alike. Much as Lucy found her dearest friends once she stepped through the wardrobe, you may find yours as you enter Brightwing and set off on an adventure with Mr. Mole and his friends. Much as Lucy could only dream of going to Narnia again and again, the characters in this story are ones who we will want to visit over and over. Having read this book four times now…I would know! I hope that you enjoy it as much as I have!
Hallelujah!
For the Lord our God the Almighty reigns...
On his robe and on his thigh he has a name written,
'King of kings and Lord of lords'.
~ Revelation 19
For the Lord our God the Almighty reigns...
On his robe and on his thigh he has a name written,
'King of kings and Lord of lords'.
~ Revelation 19
Posted in FamilyUpdate
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